Boy Closed

Boy closed out the first week of school today. Fortunately, we have Labor Day 3-day weekend to pick up the pieces and regroup. Boy is teetering on the brink of psychiatric crisis. He says he’s depressed. I see signs of intense stress. It sounds bad but this is typical new school year struggle for Boy. A friend who raised two boys told me that a parent’s job is to keep them alive until age 21. Four years to go.

Boy missed his 6pm curfew last night but answered his phone when I called. He gave me his general location. I was able to pick him up and have him home by 7pm. He was clearly sad – on the verge of tears. Boy rarely cries so I took note. When I inquired, I got no response. I was pleased that Boy was safe and with me, so I let it drop. Boy ate dinner, growled at family for a few minutes and was in bed by 7:30pm. I recorded it as a successful night.

I set my alarm for 5:30am, an hour early, allowing time to complete Geometry homework. I never tell Boy that it’s earlier than usual. I just proceed as normal. We have a very specific morning routine. Boy is very attached to his routines. I pay the price when I try to change his routines. Boy teaches Mom: Respect the Routine.

He’s not very aware in the mornings. This morning is no exception. The Geometry assignment is not difficult for Boy. One problem is a brain teaser and Boy glommed on to it and showed me how to get the right answer. I calculated an incorrect answer but Boy proved me wrong with a diagram. It’s exactly these moments that convince me that Boy has a big brain masked by disabilities.

Starting Tuesday, Boy will be in a mainstream Conceptual Physics class in addition to his mainstream Geometry class. I am so happy with this development.  It has been four years since Boy sat in a mainstream classroom. And he has never been in a classroom without an aide, other than 1^st grade. Boy has also been given the option to shadow the grounds crew rather than sit in study hall. He will earn elective credit either way. I thought he would be happy with the shadow option but he’s not because its not his first choice. His first choice is to shadow a PE teacher. Initially, I was disappointed with Boy’s ungrateful stance. The school staff and I have jumped through some flaming hoops to make last minute scheduling changes per Boy’s wishes. But really, what teenager is grateful for parental effort? I’m over it.

I’m wondering how school was today for Boy. I haven’t heard from him. I’ve tried calling and texting. No response. It’s an hour past curfew. I don’t expect him to come home tonight. It’s just a gut feeling. Boy was very cranky this morning. He was yelling before 7am. He told me that when he is 18 next year, he will not invite me to his IEP meetings because I just mess things up. He’s angry because he is still stuck in two SpED classes: English and World History. I’m not sure if I should be listening to Boy for a message or if I should consider his words an angry tirade - teenage tantrum. He’s out the door a few minutes early to catch his bus. I record it as a successful morning.